Sir Octopus Paul visits India

The Whine of India

December 20th, 20x0

Sir Octopus Paul finally arrived in India, surrounded by his Z level security, for a touch-and-go visit of the country. His first stop was the sea-facing villa of eminent writer Anirudh Shetty, who kindly consented to have our undercover reporter work as one of the staff. We provide an exclusive coverage of the grand party, attended by the who's who of the society.

Reporter X -

" Sir Paul sat droopy eyed in his spacious tank as a bevy of children gently pushed against the velvet ropes excitedly pointing their fingers at him. "Where are all the other fishies Mom?" a frowning child asked his mother. "Beta, this is not an aquarium, we have only come to meet Shri Shri Paulji! Papa is going to ask him some important questions." "But papa always listens to you. Why does he have to ask Paulji?" "Sshh beta.. don't say such things loudly! It's because Paulji can predict the future properly."  

But what the crowd couldn't predict was that "Paulji" as he was fondly called that evening wasn't in any mood to predict. When presented with chits, he instead chose to relish on the pieces of 'Bombay Lobster' lying in his tank. Devotees, fans and other socialites clucked their tongue's in disappointment,as the their trooping through the monstrous traffic and the multiple security checks at the entry was all about to go in vain.  

A visible upset Bummer Singh was yelling at the non-plussed German bodyguards - 

"What do you mean he wont predict tonight? How can this happen? Do you know who I am?" 

"Sir, Sir Paul is having his snacks, and he will not be disturbed at this time."

"Atleast let me see him, I have some important decisions to consult him for."

"Sir, Sir Paul prefers not to be disturbed at this time."

"At least ask him, i am sure he knows I'm destined to meet him now, this is important."

The guards exchanged disgusted looks at trooped towards Sir Paul and dropped in two cards- 'Meet Bummer Singh , do no meet mr. Bummer Singh' 

Sir Paul cast a long eye at the cards, darted a sharp look at the guards and moved on to Bombay ducks, probably wishing these were as common around the globe as politicians' tantrums. 

Bummer was bummed out, no doubt. He went over to Charred Power, among the few who still had a bit of a smile on - " Arre Bummer Saheb, just chill. I have a fool-proof plan in mind to get private darshan of Paul ji " 

A glimmer of hope swept across Bummer's face - "How?"

C. Power - "Simple! I have a setting with Mr. Throw-away to demonstrate in front of Paulji's hotel, so tha he is delayed. And then we will personally intervene in the matter, and as a favour ask for a private darshan in return!"

Bummer began shimmer and continued to chatter with Power.

Across the hall, Tania G eyed the duo suspiciously -

" I think Bummerji is joining Powerji's party. Our efforts to get him in weren't good enough."

"I agree" grunted Dhanmohan Singh. 

"All is not lost, but I think we can yet get him" she sighed "He can be quiet an asset. Specially since he is very close to the Baccha's."

"Hmmm... I agree" came the grunted reply.

"But I'm still not sure about him, maybe I should ask Paulji"

"Hmm.. I agree" 

"Ha Ha, I wish even Paulji listens to everything I say" she smiled on "like you do!"

"Hmmm.. I.. are.. Hmmm"

Beauty Chinta and Brainy Mukherjee were trying on some delicacies. 

Brainy- "Phew.. Thank God.. Now I hope he can predict my next release.." 

Beauty(witholding a murky laughter) - "Brainy, c'mon yaar.. I think its time we move on from this acting business.. Come over  to cricket.. Ill talk to Laloo Modi.. He'z suucha gem.. M sure he'll help you buy a team in I-IPL" 

Brainy - "Wha?"

Beauty - "The Internationl Indian premier league ya!"

Brainy - "Oh! But I've been so out of fashion exhibtion's off late"

Beauty -(this time chuckling loud)- "Brainy! M talking about the cricket league!! Huloo which world are you in?? I thought u were a staunch supporter of my team?!"

Brainy - "Oh yes I am.. just been so busy with my shootings n stuff, never go the time."

Beauty-"Are you seriously using that line on me??"

Brainy-(grinning) "Oh sorry, use to throwing it around in every party.."

Beauty -"Anyways, m gonna ask if my team will this time win.."

"Let alone win, it won't take part this time.."

Beauty was about to 

Back in the gallery, the host was overlooking the entire circus alongside fellow eminent writers Suchi V and Afroz (Mis.) G.

Suchi V-"Why are you hosting him anyways? You don't believe in looking to your future anyways."

Ani S- " who cares? Just another excuse for party.."

Afroz G - ".. And have a bevy of beauties strut their stuff around.." who just couldn't take his eyes off Kalina Khwaif.. 

Suchi V couldn't help but roll her doe eyes- "Uff you guys! Anyways, i can't think of what I could ask him?"

Ani S - " Maybe you could ask him when will you own a real camera..." 

snapping Suchi - " I am going for a Cybershot! Happy?

Ani S - "And I won't need Paul to bet that it will be pink?"

The reply was a lustrous 1000 MW smile clasped by a touch of the said colour.

Ani S - "Too bad S.R.K'MOOrthy didn't make it. His boss didn't spare him for Tweeting in the midst of the conference"

Suchi V -"Well, doesn't make much of a difference. For all you know, he'll end up asking - "Who's my celebrity lover of the day??" 

"I'm done with Boys, I want a vampire as my next one..!!" 

Ani S & Suchi V turned, an arch forming in their eyebrows which relaxed when they rested on the source of the outburst- Disha Tantanatan.. 

Ani S -"Tell you what? M curious to know what's next.. I can bet my Cayenne Paul will say it's gonna be goats next.."

Suchi V - "Afroz is to busy with Kalina Khwaif to think about what he would ask Sir Paul??"

Afroz G shaken out of his 'divine' meditation said the following cryptic words - "The question to be asked is Breakfast or Lunch? And the questioned would be not the revered mollusc but a living Gujrati version of Wikipedia.."

Return of the arched eyebrows.

"What?" said the puzzled host, 

"HE should rather predict whether he would be my breakfast or Lunch?"

Suchi V - "What have you against him? Not a German football fan are you?"

Afroz G - "Certainly not, but if you care to look right there, our good friend Kshemu D has managed to get past the German Bodyguards.."

Ani S - "Uski M#**&% #*@*&@*&*#.>!!!!!" (runs off)

Afroz G - ".. and being a Veggie, m sure he won't make a feast out of him, so that leaves me with a feast in hand.. and.. M sure Khalina would like to join in.."

~The End~