Slap Song

Yo guys!

I write song..

Flop song..

Slap song..

Umm..  why this Slap-a –veri slap-a-tune-slap-a-kyun di? – 2

Saif-u babu, go to eat-u, noise-u make-u loud-u

NRI babu, mad become-u  gave one thapaack-u

Slap-u, punch-u & nose broke-u

Saif went jail-u

Media roar-u, makes uproar-u

Saif got a bail-u

Ohh why this Slap-a –veri slap-a-tune-slap-a-kyun di? – 2

Be it Shahrukh or Pawar everybody is in it. The Bacchans just got a daughter or Im sure they would get one too. (mostly Abhishek, for still acting)

I am surprised Salman has not given one out yet.

Remember the shoe/chappal flinging incidents?

Thanks to the recession, people are making the wiser choice of retaining their articles.

Slap is free, gives a better prospect of hitting the target and doesn’t matter if it hurts or not. Publicity guaranteed.

You see politicians are making a bee line for jails these days, these guys just don’t mind chilling out in the AC jails till their out. So here’s one punishment that can be given –

Line em up in the public (or inside the walls of the jail), media and all, and slap them, everyday.

The EC need not give summons and jail terms to all those violating code of conduct. Breaking the law? 

Violating code of conduct? Rahul Gandhi, Salman Khurshid.. come here.. SLAP!

Even if the slappers get jailed, what could be the jail term? Besides, like I said earlier, jail is just a joke.

No need of mob lynching! Caught a thief? Stand in line, SLAP-SLAP-SLAP! So even if he enters that area again, people will recognize him, he just cant afford to come back again.

Considering the slow moving justice in India, SLAP might be the judicial reform we were looking for!

Just kidding..

Too violent u say? Not at all. Ask Russell Peters.. he can vouch for it.

It can even result in a fortune for the slapped.

For example there was this really irritating kid who dared to go and bug Rajnikanth..

Rajni touched that boys face….“SLAPP..” “Ouuuuuuuu…. Ouuuuuu” sang the child.

Yes, you guessed it right! Apna Himesh bhai! He made a whole career and fortune out of just crying. And he has enough money to make his own movie, act in it and he doesn’t even wish for an audience. That’s power of a slap. (Disclaimer:  But that’s Rajnikanth’s slap)

But here’s another song to sign off with..

“Chaanta lagaa…. Hain lagaa… a jaa.. raa jaa.. Kaan ke niche.. tere takle ke piche.. laga ke diya.. zor se diya.. bajaa ke diyaa.. chaanta lagaa..”

Warning – Mr. Sibal, if you are planning to censor this blog or included songs... Well.. wear cheek guards. Mind it!