Showing posts with label Shah rukh Khan. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Shah rukh Khan. Show all posts

Friday, August 24, 2012

Thank you, Poonam Pandey.

I have quit complaining. Seriously, not joking. Some random baba met me and told me to that solution to all the problems is to be more happy and grateful.

And I want to express my gratitude to some of the newsmakers of today, for the inspiration they provide.

You know, I am after all the Aam Aadmi. Till now, the only time the aam aadmi got any attention was the elections. Evolving with the times, I am grateful to you O government, for paying special attention to social media. I always thought due to the double generation gap, you would stay away from the latest fad. But hey! This is it's glory. Only dinosaurs are left to login to twitter.

Shifting back to topic -

My first thanks to our Hon'ble PM, Shri Manmohan Singh. - Thank you, for your mourning in silence for the plight of the common man. I understand by your continous silence that there is a lot to mourn for us. Probably you are aware of more reasons to mourn. I am touched.

Thank you the ruling party, for showing how to prove everyone except your own men wrong. I am really surprised how you have stood tall and brave through all the alleagations. And found ways to hold yourself as Ceaser's wife. Also, thank you for entertainment. (Rahul and Diggi, where have the gone now? Their missing prime time politics)

Thank you, the principal opposition party, for being disunited. This gives oppurtunity to a lot of common man parties to take advantage of the coalition politics and the common man parties can finally earn their limelight and a lot more perquisites that come with that.

Thank you Poonam Pandey, for showing that even an ugly duckling can dominate headlines of the leading online news website.

Dear TOI, thank you for giving hope in the start, middle and end of your website. After all we have only bad news coming al the time. But you are the pioneers! and entertain everyone with second grade porn, in the top , middle and bottom - of your home page.

Thank you Sunny Leone - for proving that a pornstar can dominate the Indian Media - infact more than the Khan trio combined, forget actresses - in recent months, without shedding your modesty on screen or media.

Dear CAG, thank you for showing great guts in revealing your audit results. So what if the auditees go scot free? And inturn call names on your distingushed self instead. But isnt that as much privilege an auditor enjoys in this country?

Thank you Kabir Khan. Why waste your brains racking up an awesome plot? Just take a Khan, patch him up with Katrina, invest in action sequences and you have a winner! I never had any interest in art, but now I've realised that my story infused preferred movies, will all soon be called art cinema.

Thank You Dhoble, for giving some jobless people a life for a month.

Thank you comedians on twitter. Ironically, your jokes make more sense than sense itself.

Thank you Aamir Khan, for Satyamev Jayate. It really raised a debate. There were people for the show v/s people against the show. A really passionate debate ensued. Nation is still the same. But there are a few, not covered by media, who have taken resolutions, who have started taking baby steps in helping those around them and most important - those suffering got a chance to meet you, I cant imagine the thrill in them.

Thank you Mamata Didi. Agreed you've not rolled back any prices, and arrested many common men, and realeased some nuts from jail - forcibly. I mean you are serious entertainment. (And please, I am not a maoist.)

Thank you, the Indiam Army Fans page on Facebook. Ive stopped worshipping cricketers and movie persons. Ive got a new following, thanks to you.

Thank you Arnab Goswami. You have made every issue a sensational one. So much so iv lost sensation of what's sensation and I'm another Brutus in the making. Just the stoic part, I wont mess with Caeser. Honestly, no.

Thank you Hollywood, for flattering Bollywood, by copying our emo story style. You made even spiderman into a younger weeping Shah Rukh Khan.

Thank you intelligence agencies of India. I know youve not figured out our scamsters, terrorists and the rumour mongers. So what? At least your good at getting back at social media and help ensure octogenerians pay interest in it.

Thank you Google, for not blocking this page.

Thank you reader, for reading a non-creative and already known unactionable list of facts.




 

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Shah Rukh can kiss... so what?!?

Day 1 of  Blog-O-holics Marathon, and I confess I have nuthing to write. No don't go away yet! Luckily my friends Bunty and Blunty were in conversation. Not your cracker of an event but might give u a smirk. Rolling.. Action!


Bunty: Sharukh kissed Priyanka!! OMG WTF?!
Blunty: Aww.. no worries Bunty boy, he will still go out with you..
Bunty: grrr..m #@!$%d!! Dare you say anything against SRK!
Blunty: All hail King Khan! I never said anything against him, you just blurted out the dirt!
Bunty: I...I??..I !! .. I
Blunty: wow, now you're role playing him!
Bunty: you.. I.. Why are you saying he is gay?
Blunty: I never said that! If anything this picture proves otherwise.
Bunty: you just said "he will go out with you"
Blunty: I meant chill out with you my boy.
Bunty: yeah right, like he will have the time to hang out with me!
Blunty: why not? You care so much about him!
Bunty: yes but there are so many of them who do that.
Blunty: so that means he doesn't care abt you?
Bunty: you can't say that...but how can he attend to so many fans at a time?
Blunty: so they are not answerable to all of you million caring people?
Bunty: ummm..but He loves his fans!
Blunty: whether he smokes a beedi or cigar? Dusn't matter right?
Bunty: yes yes that's his choice.
Blunty: so whether he kisses Gauri Khan or Priyanka?
Bunty: that's shocking! How cud he...?!
Blunty: who cares?...
Bunty: all of us do! Priyanka is just using him for publicity!
Blunty: so you think he is dum enuf not to take care of that?
Bunty: ahhh.. He is not dum.. Ahh.. He probably doesn't care.
Blunty: I rest my case.

Gentlemen, we learn an important lessons in keeping publicity alive among fans and haters- pointless stunts talks louder than acting skills.