"If life gives you lemons.." quotes from Poonam Pandey and others..

Tired of the lemonade answer, I reached out to some movers and shakers for alternative answers. I return much more disappointed and now it's your turn. 

"If life gives you lemons, make a lemon scam.." - statement from Scam cell, Tihar.

"If life gives you lemons, find 555 benefits of it.." - Phunsuk Waingdu

"If life gives you lemons, just laugh and admit lemons don't exist" - Sushil K Shinde.

"If life gives you lemons, sell them and buy out life as well and sell more lemons.." - Reliance

"If life gives you lemons, let them go missing and let BJP waste time on it... Theek hai?" - PMO

"If life gives you lemons, it means Sonia Gandhi wants a Bill passed.." - Maya & Mulayam

"If life gives you lemons, get a panel to throw all the lemon at each other.." - Arnab Goswami.

"If life gives you lemons, buy out all the shizzy hardware to make a lemonade.." - Microsoft

"If life gives you lemons, ask Sachin to retire.." - A media source who didn't want to be named.

"If life gives you lemons, you can invest it in Gujarat.." - Narendra Modi

"If life gives you lemons, let us know.." - Twitter

"If life gives others lemons, let us know.." - Twitter.

"If life gives you lemons, setup a committee to resolve the matter" - BCCI

"If life gives you lemons, your state of mind wants Nimbu Paani.. " - Rahul Gandhi

"If life gives you lemons, that means we can bring poverty line down to Rs. 25 a day." - Montek Singh Ahluwalia.

"If life gives you lemons, pray you get worth Rs. 12." - Raj Babbar

"If life gives you lemons, it's because the oranges were taken by RSS.." - Digvijaya Singh

"If life gives you lemons, save it for hangovers" - Vijay Mallya

"If life gives you lemons, promise a show of melons..ha ha.. ppl will love you even if you dont have them.." - Poonam Pandey

"If life gives you lemons, let the 'hand' do the talking" - (h)MMS.

"If life gives you lemons, Roadies is your haven.. " - MTV

"If life gives you lemons, and you follow any of those quotes, we get ready material.." - Stand up comedians on Twitter.

"If life gives you lemons, write bizzare posts to let the world know about it." - Yours truly

The Shetty Life-Cricket theory

I am not claiming any patent here. Nor am I gonna give lectures on this theory. Precisely because India being a cricket centric country, I am sure there are many proponents of the said practice below, but may have not expressed this in full context.

At times when I am down on ideas and need a way out of situations, there is this brainwave - of converting the situation in context of a cricket match.

Simple examples - If there is a lot of work pending and very little time, term it as - "Thats a high Required Run rate". Then think like a batsman in a pressure situation and play it like a game. It has worked.

When there is a long drawn work, testing your mettle and patience - "Its a test match."

Converting situations thus way helps take a layer of pressure off the heart. I say heart because of tendency to bring an emotional angle into issues. Like self-blaming and self-pitying on outcomes of plausible cause analysis. For some the emotional angle takes a better turn, where one pushes oneself emotionally to take charge and manage the situation. Somehow I tend to twine myself into further knots and get impossibly tangled in a utter mess.

Making it into a game increases the scope of a clear analysis. But you do need to process your analysis quickly though. You cant waste too much time equating every factor.

The clarity comes because you keep the analysis light. In a middle of a game you have a target, you need to make a game plan/strategy. But its not some pen and paper chalked detailed analytical plan. Its an instinct driven, learn on the move plan. Your bullish on winning and grab at whatever oppurtunities that present itself(No balls & free hits, power play, extras{freebies}).

Back in 10th (ICSE Boards) drew a World League Plan format. Presuming myself to be the Indian team, I converted the subjects into different teams. Simple factors for classifaction was - Difficulty, trickiness and favouritism.

For example there may be subjects which could be easy, but you could make silly errors. E.g. Mathematics. Make that Bangladesh, if you slip - they pounce on you! Then there is History - Long and strong portion - Australia.

I dont remember the order I used then, but using the logic I designated teams to each of the 11 exams, perhaps making A teams too.

After the exams - at night when I would take a walk I would review the performance. Areas where I didnt get an answer = a wicket. Marks = Runs. By the end of the walk I was done thinking about that subject and move on to the next.

I was stuck in a rut recently.  Everything seemed to be going wrong. A series of mistakes and close to break down point. Then try to load this theory. Didn't work out.

And out of the blue I remembered Sachin Tendulkar. Grateful am I to the back of my mind. Sachin is not my god, but is definately one of the ideals. I just remembered how this man for a period of 21 years, has had his life intervened by the media. There is the media, the public which makes him God one moment and Devil the next. One bad series is enough to rouse national hatred. He is not inhumane that he can merely deflect criticism.

If he has the capacity to sustain an international colonoscopy of his life & performances, I am sure I can take little pow and wow once in a while.

And chart a comeback path staying focused at it. Absorption is the key; whatever helps you stay focused in the 'game', do it.